How long is too long being single? As much as I enjoy being single is there an age in which being single should be looked down upon? Or does age determine if you will relax your standards for the sake of being in a relationship.
As I get older I start to think about what’s next for me in the aspect of my romantic life.
With age these questions become more relevant. In full transparency I’m 37 years young with a 20 year old daughter. So the average concerns of a woman my age or one slightly younger and the idea her biological clock is ticking is not my direct concern.
With all the aforementioned, I still wonder is there a certain age you should be seeking a committed relationship.
Relationships have so much to offer. The security of knowing someone has your back, companionship, learning to truly love without limitation, partnership, and growth. Having someone to build a life with is an amazing thing and certainly one I want. With this notion I wonder if I am missing out waiting too long in commitment to someone.
In comparison, being single afford you time and the liberty to worry solely on yourself. It affords you the freedom to simply not give a fuck about anyone’s feeling, baggage, or drama.
Furthermore, being single, you determine what and who you would tolerate in a shorter time. You learn what you want in a man from seeing how others act or treat you.
But, importantly, you learn what you like sexually and how to communicate those desires. In addition, it gives you time to discover what love really is instead of just going through the motions.
Being Single vs. Relationships
All things considered both have great benefits. However, I’m sure if you had this conversation with a therapist he or she would have you consider a few questions.
- Are you ready to be in a relationship?
- Have you worked through your challenges or issues from your past relationships?
- Are you holding on to baggage?
- Are you able to trust?
Read how I attempted d to work through these issues here https://www.mytruthlieshere.com/getting-over-your-ex-how-to-move-on-from-your-past-relationship/ .
But let’s break this cycle of thinking, finding the right guy is the only way you work through past relationship issues. Period!!
Finding someone that will invest time and patience in helping you work through those issues with love, dedication, and action is the only way. A man plays the an important role in building and maintaining a healthy relationship.
So does age make a difference in how long you choose to be single? Or should we focus more on finding the right mate?
So where do you find these young lads you say?
In a world of online dating https://bumble.com/some guys are overly eager for a relationship; and some want to be just as single as you but hope you are not dating anyone else.
So honestly where do you start to find “Mr. Right”? A guy that want the responsibility of a relationship. Yes, the responsibility?! Relationships are a lot of work and being accountable for someone else happiness can be scary.
Ideally, you hope to find a mate in a grocery store, at a church service, shit walking across the street but now and days that logic seem so far removed. Having someone approach you is a less common thing. Do guys think it’s a woman’s place to approach them? Because outside of online dating to actually meet a woman you have to approach them not just stare at them (shoulder shrug).
So I guess my answer to this question is age shouldn’t influence how long you are single, rather meeting the right guy. It’s a sad day if we have to consider age over standards when selecting your forever mate.
What’s the rush?!
When you finally meet the right guy have a real conversation about what you want. Similarly, see if his vision aligns with yours. If it doesn’t- don’t waste your time trying to “figure it out”. Only consider your age when you are moving on. Because being single is certainly better than wasting your time in an unbalanced relationship wasting your youthful years.
If he’s looking for something different than you- get out of there girlfriend.
If we start to think about age as a measure to getting into a relationship or committing to someone than we risk settling for men that do not cherish us and treat us like queens we are!
Don’t settle you deserve better.
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